{"id":3310,"date":"2023-07-31T11:47:28","date_gmt":"2023-07-31T10:47:28","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/sites.hertford.ox.ac.uk\/bridge\/?p=3310"},"modified":"2024-08-06T11:46:40","modified_gmt":"2024-08-06T10:46:40","slug":"menopause-cafe-or-how-watching-tv-led-me-to-start-a-charity","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/sites.hertford.ox.ac.uk\/bridge\/menopause-cafe-or-how-watching-tv-led-me-to-start-a-charity\/","title":{"rendered":"Menopause Caf\u00e9 or How watching TV led me to start a charity"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

I was apprehensive about attending my first Gaudy, 30 years after graduating. I\u2019m not sure what I was scared of: being bored, being intimidated, feeling out of place?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

My dear tutor, Brian Steer, tipped the balance by inviting my maths class of \u201985 to lunch at his home the day after the Gaudy.  I knew I would enjoy the Saturday, even if the Friday night was an unknown quantity.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So I found myself back in Hall, eating, chatting with old friends and thence to the bar, which I had last visited in Freshers\u2019 Week. Later, while crossing the Hertford Bridge a friendly woman said \u201chello\u201d and we got chatting. Turned out she lived in Scotland too, so we exchanged contact details.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And thus began a new friendship!  Ness Collingridge (Geography 1986) and I have continued meeting up and chatting. She\u2019s collected my daughter from Glasgow airport at midnight and invited me to speak about my charity at Caf\u00e9 Scientifque Glasgow. I love her warmth, kindness, enthusiasm and hospitality.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In February 2017, I had watched a TV documentary by Kirsty Wark called \u201cMenopause and Me\u201d and was gob-smacked!\u00a0 It showed that menopause could affect my feelings and my thinking, as well as my body, and not just hot flushes \u2013 a whole host of symptoms.\u00a0 As a counsellor, I knew that talking helps. I had been hosting Death Caf\u00e9s<\/strong><\/a>, so why not use the same format for a different taboo subject?\u00a0 My husband created a website. We held our first Menopause Caf\u00e9<\/strong><\/a> in Perth in June 2017.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"
Rachel Weiss (Maths, 1985) at Blend caf\u00e9 in Perth, Scotland, where the first Menopause Caf\u00e9 was held. Picture by Elizabeth Dalziel.<\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Over a 1,000 pop-up Menopause Caf\u00e9s have now been held worldwide. Volunteers host these discussion groups in their workplace or in their neighbourhood, online or in person. They\u2019re open to all ages and genders, becuase our charity\u2019s aim is to increase awareness and knowledge about the menopause, so that everyone feels comfortable talking about it, if they so wish.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cJust a thank you for tonight to all…who came, listened, talked, laughed and shared. Without sounding mushy I am actually very grateful for my menopause right now, this caf\u00e9<\/a> you have started has given me back my confidence and laughter.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

In 2018 we organised the world\u2019s first Menopause Festival. Our 5th<\/sup> festival, \u00a0#FlushFest23<\/strong><\/a> , takes place on September 8th<\/sup> and 9th, in person in Edinburgh and also online. There\u2019ll be a Menopause Cabaret, featuring performances by singers, poets and storytellers. Also medic talks, a conversation with Val McDermid and her wife, creative workshops and\u2026 \u201cThe Revenge of the Invisible Women\u201d by Dr Vanessa Collingridge!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So I encourage you to go to a Gaudy; it\u2019s not just about renewing old friendships, but also starting new ones and finding surprising collaborations!
<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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\"\"<\/figure><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n

Menopause Caf\u00e9, Perth<\/em> \/ Dr Vanessa Collingridge (Geography, 1986)<\/em><\/p>\n

Categories<\/span>Experience<\/a><\/div>
Tags<\/div>charity<\/a>friendship<\/a>gaudy<\/a>menopause<\/a><\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I was apprehensive about attending my first Gaudy, 30 years after graduating. I\u2019m not sure what I was scared of: being bored, being intimidated, feeling..<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":20,"featured_media":3312,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[118,117,116,115],"class_list":["post-3310","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-experience","tag-charity","tag-friendship","tag-gaudy","tag-menopause"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/sites.hertford.ox.ac.uk\/bridge\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3310","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/sites.hertford.ox.ac.uk\/bridge\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/sites.hertford.ox.ac.uk\/bridge\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sites.hertford.ox.ac.uk\/bridge\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/20"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sites.hertford.ox.ac.uk\/bridge\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3310"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"https:\/\/sites.hertford.ox.ac.uk\/bridge\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3310\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3332,"href":"https:\/\/sites.hertford.ox.ac.uk\/bridge\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3310\/revisions\/3332"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sites.hertford.ox.ac.uk\/bridge\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/3312"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/sites.hertford.ox.ac.uk\/bridge\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3310"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sites.hertford.ox.ac.uk\/bridge\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3310"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sites.hertford.ox.ac.uk\/bridge\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3310"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}